Male bottom held on a leash by a female top

Male bottom held on a leash by a female top

I spend a lot of my day thinking about how a relationship where I am a slave would actually work. What would a day in the life of the submissive me actually be like? How would common activities change for me? How would they change for my Mistress? What would happen if I didn’t agree with her on something? I could really go on with questions for ever I think, but I’ll stop and try to talk my way through a couple of them.

I have a reasonably stressful job sometimes – I spend a lot of my day making a lot of decisions about a lot of people’s businesses, and without wanting to sound like a total egomaniac, I’m very good at what I do. I’m not a big CEO or any type of high-flying executive, it’s not something I want, but I’m fairly well up the corporate ladder. I think that this is one of the reasons that I enjoy being more submissive outside of work. Not having to make decisions, just doing what I’m told – its something that I don’t get at all day-to-day in my job, and really I don’t know that I would want it like that at work – and this brings me to dilemma number 1 – how can I go about being completely submissive to my Mistress while still being able to command respect while I’m at work? The two seem very much so the opposite.

So what would an average day look like then – I wake up early, shower and groom myself and prepare breakfast for Mistress, then a suit up with my chastity belt hidden under the pants and then run off to work where the mentality switches. I’m in the office and I’m making the decisions, I’m responsible for things, I’m the one people count on to get stuff done. Then I come home, and need to switch that off and listen to what Mistress wants from me. I need to prepare dinner, clean the house, as well as look after any of her needs. I would love to take care of someone like that, but I struggle to turn off the work thing, and the fact that I do end up needing to bring work home with me sometimes doesn’t help the thought either. When that happens and I have work I need to do, how do I fit that around Her? Will She understand? And what if understanding and letting me do my work at home means she is effectively handing control back to me so that I choose how I spend me time? Because if that’s the case then really I’m not submitting to Her will at all, I’m just playing the slave when it suits me – and when I think about it that way I don’t want that, not at all. On the other hand though, I am at a really good place with my career and I’ve worked incredibly hard to get where I am, so I don’t want to give that up either.

That leaves me wondering, what would happen then if we disagreed on that – or anything for that matter? The “I will be a good slave for Her” part of me says that surely that would never happen, because I should always do what she says – and that thought does make me happy when I think it. But then what of the ramifications of me not being able to do that work I bring home? It would certainly make my time during the day a lot harder and potentially hurt the career side of things as well. So what would the dispute between us be like over something like that? To be honest I really don’t know.

Truth be told, I would like to think maybe Mistress could find some way of us both winning – like I can do my work at home, but I need to do it naked and chained to the desk, or I must have a butt plug inserted in me and a ball gag in my mouth while I do it. But I have two problems with that sort of thing – first, I’ll be honest, I would love those things done to me, so they wouldn’t really be something that encouraged me to finish the work faster or anything like that, and second, if I were to suggest something like that I would have a feeling like it only happened because I wanted it, and as such I’m controlling things instead of Her and I would know it, so I would just feel horrible for that. I want to give my submission to Her as a gift, I don’t want to claim back when it suits me.

I want to be a good slave – in fact, I’m going to be a good slave, I’m going to be a great slave. I just need to figure out how to strike some sort of balance between the submissive me and the work me I suppose – and I’m not sure if that’s something I can do on my own.